Well more stuff has happened since my last post. The guy that lives here is a nice guy and all, but I can't see myself with him. I mean yeah he makes me smile and I enjoy hanging with him, but I just can't do it. The reason being is that for one he keeps begging me to put on panties. He has some crotchless panties and seems to enjoy making masculine guys wear them. I think friend wise it would be great to have him around, but can't see dating him seriously. Now we'd be friends with benefits, but that's probably about it. Plus the whole fact he's going to be gone for a year just won't work. If we were together longer then maybe. Yes we do have a year, but by the time we get serious he'll be gone. Plus I have a lease that's not up until next may. Plus I have to tell him about my ex. So he may not even be around or is around, but as a friend.
As for the guy that lives 2 hours away I think he wants a relationship, but doesn't want one with me because of our distance which is fine. Plus he will only text in the mornings, but be on bear later on and not text back. So at least I have a friend in him. Least I think I do.
As for the guy that lives the furthest away. Out of all the guys he's the one I miss the most if I don't hear from him. We have talked the most and he's a really sweet guy. In fact I'm going to be calling him tomorrow and we are going to talk. I figure I have to be honest with him and let him know I live with my ex if we for sure want to be serious. If he really wants to get to know me it won't bother him. We aren't having sex and he's not seeing me naked. It's just something I have to work around. And if he can't accept it then I guess it wasn't meant to be and I'll move on. It's part of my whole taking it slow type thing. Plus it will set a bit more of my paranoia to rest.
I also found out something interesting the other day. Awhile back I was dating this guy. I don't remember what I called him on here. Well shortly after he said he wasn't ready for a relationship he got into one. Like a month later. Around the same time he wouldn't respond to me more than 2 replies. Anyway he has been on grindr and scruff a lot more. Even changed his photo to a shirtless one. Well I went on his grindr profile since he can't see that I looked at it. He now says he's single. I know it's bad karma, but that fact made me smile a bit on the inside. Now granted I don't know the details of the break up, but I can't help but think it's cause of his drinking. He's 20 and yes he drinks enough to get drunk. Or the distance could have been the problem. Like I said I know it's bad karma, but I had to be honest.
Sad to say that Erik Rhodes passed away last night of a heart attack in his sleep. I'm saddened by this mainly because it seemed like he went through so much. I mean I read some of his blog entries and I couldn't get through them because they were so depressing. Seemed like he was coming out of the other end though. It's hard to explain but when he was really down I couldn't watch anything he did during that time period. Only recently has he really seemed to grab my attention like whatever was bothering me about him was going away. Rest in peace big guy.
This is an adorable picture. I love big guys. I just think it's just a loveable outside for a good inside. This picture signifies that to me. Now yes I know there are some big guys that are jerks, but don't think this guy is one of them. Just a nice change of pace.
I do like guys that look like this guy here. Yes he's in better shape than most, but he's not so big that you feel you can't approach him. Plus his dick curves similar to the way mine does. Difference being that mine goes to the left v.s. the right. This era in porn was more about the average guy than bigger guys.
I wish I had a pair of underwear like this guy, but I don't think I'd fill it out as well as this guy. I just wonder if the asked him to get hard or if he's truly a shower. Yes for the most part black guys do have big dicks, but not all of us are that well endowed. I'm a 7 myself. Then again the white guys I've been with have been amazed by it.
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