Weight is up again

So last month I set my goal to pass 160 and I did then at the beginning of this month it was down again. Well I weighed myself today and it's up again. I think it's turning mostly into fat though. I am getting measured before I go off to see my sister graduate. My boyfriend is being so supportive of me working out too. He calls me his muscle stud, but I don't feel it yet. I mean I see guys that are much bigger then me coming in. Yes they've been at it longer then me, but when I finally feel like I'm in a good spot well someone bigger comes around. One of my co-workers actually competed in bodybuilding contests. I was feeling kinda good about myself until I saw him the other day and realized how much bigger he is then me. Yeah that's a downer. I mean yeah again he's been doing this a lot longer so I can't compare our results, but it really is kinda discouraging. I am in this for the long haul though. I don't want to be like so many guys I see that go at it for like 3 months in take 3 years off. I want to really reshape my body. Basically my goal is to reach something like this.
I don't know how old this guy is, but if I look like him at his age I'd be happy. I know it will take a lot of hard work. Plus I'm short so it's hard enough to get weight on me once I reach a certain point, but that is really my goal. To be an older guy that looks really good. I don't want to be one of those old guys that has a stomach way out there. Don't want to be ashamed to take of my clothes. I mean working out has really helped my self esteem, but it's still low. I think I'll be happy when everyone notices me. Tired of getting asked o I workout. Some days I look down and I see results and other days I just feel like the same skinny guy I was when I moved up here. Makes me wonder why my boyfriend calls me sexy and his muscle stud. Then again he feels the same way when I do it. I think it's why we fit together so well. We help boost the others ego in more ways then one. I mean a boyfriend is supposed to be supportive right? I think that's why when my boyfriend says it I kinda feel better, then I don't because it feels like he's just saying it. I will say he's a lot better then my ex. Wow I gain a little weight and I mean he's going on and on about how puffy my cheeks look. Pokes my gut. Just made me feel like a fatty. Did I do that to him no. I go on and on about how good he looks because he had been working out. I had him flex for me and I was all over him. He calls me fat and points out that my ass is getting huge. Yeah the more I think about that relationship the more I realize goo thing I got out. Anyway enough about that. Time for some videos. 1st up is a weird compilation. The person that posted the video for some reason added a backstage moment with Erik Rhodes and Matthew Rush from the movie Heaven to Hell. Then it goes on to Scott Gunz and Gauge. Now Scott Gunz is a huge dude. Very nice build. Gauge looks a little smaller in this one then he does in the one "before he got famous". Anyway just a muscle worshiping scene. No cumshot at the end. Next up is a scene from another Catalina film that I forget the name to. Mike Grant plays a cop that has come to investigate a noise complaint from the neighbors. As you can imagine it's a guy skinny dipping and doesn't want Mike to cuff him so they go at it. Mike is a very hot guy. The 3rd film is a scene from some German flick. I think. The guy is chained up then gets out and starts jacking off. Then it goes into another scene. Don't think the person that posted it spliced it right. Next is a little after gym hours steam room action. This is a scene from some movie by an Australian company. Guys in Australian are some of the hottest on the planet I swear. Loved to be there with them. Our final movie is a scene with Paul Gator and Ivan Andros from the Catalina movie Bear Bust. Catalina does such horrible acting, but great sex. Paul is the type of guy I'm finding myself more and more attracted to. A shorter guy that's built like a bull. I find him way hot in this scene and Ivan in no slouch either. A great ending to a pretty great movie.